DEAR ABBY: Sometime ago, you printed a letter from one of your readers who was upset over her son’s polyamorous relationship. I didn’t respond then, but now that my triad is ready to come out to my boyfriend’s family (we are out to mine and to my husband’s·family), I feel the need to address this lifestyle in your column and ask your advice.

My husband and I have been together 10 years. We started out as swingers. When we met my now-boyfriend, it became apparent that it was going to be more serious than “play” partners. Our particular arrangement is a “V” triad, meaning I am involved with two (husband and boyfriend), but they are not involved with each other.

My boyfriend is extremely important to us in every way. We all work together to make a very smooth-running, loving household.

I want you and your readers to know that this is a viable relationship with love, respect and, most important, open communication. This kind of relationship — or any, for that matter — is doomed without it.

Continues at http://news.yahoo.com/woman-husband-lover-wants-one-big-happy-family-063203234.html

What would you say if your partner had feelings for someone else as well as you? We meet polyamorous lovers as they prepare for their largest London gathering.

You may think Matt Bobbu, 23, is a lucky guy. He’s been with his girlfriend, Katy, for two years. With her consent, he also has a long-distance boyfriend, Mike. Mike is engaged to a girl who is dating one of Katy’s friends. Meanwhile, Bobbu’s flatmate is dating a girl who’s dating Katy.

Confused? Well there are triads, quads, open networks, secondary partners and pansexual love affairs to consider too. This is the menu of relationships open if you don’t believe in restricting romantic feelings to one person. Bobbu and his coterie of lovers will be gathering for Polyday this Saturday, at Dragon Hall near Holborn, London. It’s a gathering with workshops, talks and social activities for anyone who follows, or is interested in, the romantic web of polyamory.

Continues at http://www.metro.co.uk/lifestyle/873009-polyamory-sharing-the-love-yes-well-take-that

I have been in a relationship with my girl for half a year, and recently we discussed opening up our relationship. She has always been interested in polyamory and made it clear to me from the beginning that this was something that she would want to act on. I am intrigued by the idea, but I am also concerned about jealousy. Is this something I will be able to get over? How do people keep their jealousy in check? Any advice for a successful, healthy open relationship?

Continues at http://www.afterellen.com/column/the-hook-up-29?page=0,1

Casual can be a tricky word to define in the context of relationships. It means not serious, that’s always clear, but what exactly “not serious” is less certain.

Some people think of casual as “we are sleeping together and I can sleep with other people,” while others are more of the variety “if we want to sleep with other people, we split with no hard feelings.” Still, fewer think that casual means “I have a significant other, but we are in an open relationship, and we’re casual so you don’t really need to know about them.”

It’s a sticky word for a sticky situation.

If you want to enter into a casual relationship with a clear conscience, make sure you are up front with the other person if you are sleeping or intend to sleep with someone else. This allows the other person to give informed consent.

A lot of people aim to stay casual — a friends with benefits arrangement — because they think that it is easier than a full-blown relationship. In some ways it is, but it doesn’t get you out of communicating.

More at http://www.dailycal.org/2011/08/08/sticking-by-your-friends/

Adam Sandler may often be thought of as the king of movies for idiots, but every now and then he does something kind of edgy in his own uniquely Sandler way. This could turn in to one of those times since, word is he may be making a movie about gay polyamory.

More at http://www.cinemablend.com/new/Adam-Sandler-Doing-A-Gay-Polyamorous-Three-Men-And-A-Baby-Remake-25986.html

From Pepper Mint

This year I’m putting together a new polyamory theme camp with the help of a bunch of my friends.  We will be holding workshops, putting on parties, and doling out nonmonogamy advice to anyone who wanders in.  Feel free to stop by and chat with us!  Also, be sure to check out our Friday mid-evening party – it is the first ever public polyamory party on playa that I’ve heard of.

Check out the website: http://www.polyasylum.org

Please email me with any questions!  Feel free to repost.

All events are free with your BM ticket, of course.  Here is the full event roster:

Poly Doctors Are In!
Polyamory drama got you down? Feeling a bit weird after that threesome? Upset that your partner got snuggly while you were building art? Come get checked out by the Poly Doctors! Our experienced staff will take your nonmonogamy temperature and dole out advice for a healthy playamorous experience. The Poly Doctors are available any time people are in camp - feel free to stop by day or night.

Happy Insanity Hour
Tues 7-9pm
Over at the Asylum, the inmates have tied up the doctors and raided the liquor cabinet! Come drink promiscuously with the friendly nonmonogamous denizens of Poly Asylum!

The Playa Poly Party
Fri 7-10pm
Calling all polyamorous peeps, playamorous partiers, open revelers, and sashaying swingers! Poly Asylum is opening the gates and holding an all-playa party for the less-than-monogamous. Come join us and drink promiscuously, dance salaciously, and flirt indiscriminately! Rated best place to meet nonmonogamous people on playa by someone or other.

Dealing With Jealousy
Mon 3-5pm
Do you want to be in open relationships but are worried you’ll freak out if your lover gets another lover? Are you already nonmonogamous but having problems with intractable jealousy? If you want to be successful in nonmonogamy, it is important to de-fang the little green monster. Come listen to our jealousy experts as they hold forth on how to get over or at least sneak past jealousy. This workshop is targeted at nonmonogamous people, but monogamous people dealing with jealousy issues will also find it very useful.

Nurturing Secondary and Play Buddy Relationships
Tues 3-5pm
Lots of nonmonogamous folks want to have less-involved relationships, but they lack an instruction manual! People discover that they are horrible at hookups and they suck at being secondaries. Come learn tricks for lightweight relationships from the masters, such as staying present for your occasional fling and avoiding the two-year secondary slump.

Poly Perspectives Beyond Sex
Wed 3-5pm
Come for a insightful workshop on how understanding poly can help you think about yourself and your connections in a new way. See how poly principles are at play even among friends and family, how they can lead to healthier monogamous or nonmonogamous relationships alike, and what it means to cultivate compersion.

Playa Nonmonogamy Do’s and Don’ts
Thurs 3-5pm
Do: figure out any rules and clearly set expectations BEFORE coming to playa! Don’t: inform your boyfriend on Tuesday that the hottie you just met will be sharing the tent for the rest of the week. Playa breakups are notoriously caused by wandering eyes (and other body parts) in a stew of intoxication and bad decision-making. Come talk to some experienced poly folks about how to have explosively sexy playamorous adventures while avoiding fallout.

Nonmonogamy and Parenting
Fri 3-5pm
Can you raise children and step out at the same time? How do you make it to dates or play parties while still getting time with the kids? When do you tell them about your nonmonogamy? Come talk to our poly parents at the Asylum and hear how they’ve managed to have it all.

I am in an open marriage. I know what you are probably thinking because, the first time a friend said this to me, I quickly felt myself growing judge-y. My knee-jerk thought was, She’s just doing this to please her husband. How sad. And then, Oh, they must want raise their kids commune-style. Can’t relate. But now, years later, I’ve realized that every relationship is unique, and it’s about finding what works for you.

So far, I’ve found a way to make my relationship with my husband, Edmund, keep its charm, passion, intimacy and commitment. And it has happened by opening the gates.

Continues at http://www.thefrisky.com/post/246-girl-talk-my-adventures-in-open-marriage/

You *must* arrive by 8:15 to participate.

Pre-registration price: $25 per person
Door price: $40 per person
Sliding scale registration available!  Please contact us.

Deck yourself out and come spend the evening surrounded by non-monogamous people all looking their beautiful best.  Daters will have up to twelve rounds of dating, and also some break time to mingle freely or catch their breath.  Our system of remembering past dates is fully implemented, so you will be only dating new folks who meet your matching requirements.

This round is at the Revival Bar and Kitchen in Berkeley.  The Revival sources their ingredients locally, makes their own charcuterie, and crafts all their food (including vegan and vegetarian options) with care.  Their cocktails are hand-mixed, use fresh juices, and are wonderfully balanced.  They have an elegantly warm and welcoming environment.  We are excited to see how these touches can lead speed-daters to love.

The price is a bit higher than previous events, but we hope you will find it to be entirely worth it. Proceeds go primarily to the restaurant for food provided.  If you find the cost prohibitive, please contact us.  We want all to feel welcome, and will happily subsidize tickets.

Tips for dress: we are shooting for adjectives such as fabulous, glamorous, frivolous, impractical, hot, elegant, sexy, and yes, even amazing.  If you feel these things in something, then wear it!

Register now!  (Click on the option for you):

Returning Dater – if you attended the speed dating event last February at the Uptown or the previous May at the Blue Macaw:
http://www.polyspeeddating.com/reg/accounts/login/

Individual – you may or may not have relationships at the moment, but you want to look for more of them right now:
http://www.polyspeeddating.com/reg/individual/revival1

Group – You all are an existing relationship, and are looking for someone(s) together:
http://www.polyspeeddating.com/reg/group/revival1

Come get your golf on at a mini-golf and go-kart park with poly folks from both San Francisco and the South Bay. The north and south under-40 poly groups are getting together for an evening of entertainment park fun at Malibu Grand Prix, just off of 101 in Redwood City. We welcome folks of all ages for this event. http://www.malibugrandprix.com/site/Redwood/ To find us, look for folks with the pink POLY stickers. We won’t be doing a separate dinner, but the park has amusement park food and we will likely sit down for some of it at some point. Mini-golf games are $8 per person per game, and go-kart racing runs $15 for four laps – apparently laps are pretty big. RSVP to us if you want to get in on a group rate. There are various other attractions as well (bumper boats, batting cages, arcade games). Go-kart racing requires closed-toe shoes and long hair tied back. We welcome children, with the understanding that the parents rather than the group are responsible for managing them while at the park.

Email pepomint at gmail.com with any questions.

This will be the fifth Love Triangle, and each time we stock the club with around 200 nonmonogamous (mostly poly) folk. For those of you who have not been to such a large poly event, it is a truly remarkable feeling to be in a club full of people with the same relationship style. Because of this shared connection, Love Triangle is much friendlier than your average club night, and there are people meeting and socializing all over the place. The Blue Macaw is set up lounge-style with a big social area by the bar, and a large upstairs where you can get away from the music and chat.

Our resident DJs are Tomas Diablo (Strangelove) and Femme Mystique (Chronos). They will be laying down a fun mix of 80′s, goth, pop, and electro, and taking requests to boot. Dressing to the Spring Fling theme is encouraged but not at all required: bright colors, bunny ears, spring lust, sundresses, freaky, formal, or fetish.

Love Triangle Spring Fling One Year Anniversary
Friday March 11th, 9pm-2am
at The Blue Macaw, 2565 Mission St, SF
free before 9:30pm, $8 after
free for Mission Control Alliance Members
21+ with ID
www.lovetrianglesf.com

After getting their flirt on at Love Triangle, people are often sad to leave. But this time the party continues at Pink, the friendly pansexual play party. If you have never been to a Mission Control party, they are out of this world – easily the most comfortable play parties in SF and genuinely fun for all sexual orientations and experience levels.

A bunch of us will be doing the short walk over a bit after midnight, armed with discount coupons and a sexy attitude. For those of you on a budget, this is a remarkable opportunity for a full night of partying (two parties, 9pm-3:30am!) on only $20 total.

Pink! Pansexual Play Party
Friday March 11th, 10pm-3:30am
for exact location ask at Love Triangle
$20 with voucher from Love Triangle ($30 without)
21+
RSVP at: www.missioncontrolsf.org/pink

Pink has a buddy system – you must show up with other people who are responsible for you. See the website for details.